Technology has undeniably changed the way we interact with one another. In the realm of dating, social media platforms—Facebook and Twitter, for example, afford a speed and immediacy to communication, but does their usage make it harder to connect?
It’s Just Lunch recently polled more than 18,000 singles from ages 25 to 74 to study singles’ take on how technology has changed dating habits.
When asked the question “Do you prefer to text or call someone you’re interested in?” 64% said they would rather speak with that special someone on the phone, though the trend largely hinged on age, with 75% of 55 to 64 year olds year olds choosing voice calls over 54% of 25 to 34 year olds.
The widespread use of technology has redefined the very definition of intimacy, according to It’s Just Lunch matchmaker Jacquie Brownridge. “A text can be viewed as just as romantic as an intimate phone call but are we texting in the early stages of a relationship out of convenience or to avoid rejection?”
Our advice? Pick up the phone and call her. A woman wants a man who will make an effort and go the extra mile. Today, that extra mile is the difference between a date invite via text and a date invite via phone call.
If you find yourself breaking out in a sweat at just the idea of dialing the digits, here are a few tips for asking that special person out:
1) Skip the "D" Word
Try not to view it as a date. Don't inject the word into the conversation. It starts to get significant when the word makes an appearance. focus on the activity and position your request in the same informal manner you would if you were asking a friend.
2) Make It Specific
Avoid general invites such as "Let's go out sometime." It's a bit open-ended and can lead to awkward follow-up conversation. Pick something that is low-pressure, but interesting. The more you know about what the person likes to do, the better your suggestion will be. If they dig art, ask them to participate in an art crawl or attend the latest museum exhibit.
3) Keep It Casual
If you don't feel comfortable with a direct invite, try something like this:
"I'm going for a ride along the seawall this Sunday. Care to join me?"
Pose the question as if you are already going and they can join you, if interested. This will make it a bit easier on you and takes the pressure off them.
In short, when you are asking someone out - plan ahead and be specific. Know what you are going to say AND what you want to suggest doing on the date . . . er . . . get together.
The key is to relax and be yourself. Worst case scenario, they'll say they can't go out. That will bring you one step closer to someone who can. someone who appreciates you and where the chemistry connection is reciprocated and the sparks really fly.
Enjoy the ideas and feel free to chime in with your own on our It's Just Lunch Facebook page.